Title: Part 2: The next three
Author: Amber Moore
E-mail: sacredlustsandfear@yahoo.com
Fandom: Lord of the Rings (book cannon)
Pairing: Merry/Pippin (established Sam/Frodo)
Series: The Old Took Charm
Archive: List archives, yes. Everyone else let me know first, please!
Rating: R for squickyness and things of a rather sexual, though not graphic nature
Summary: Let the joys (snark) of pregnancy begin.
Feedback: Is a very nice thing indeed.
Spoilers: None really.
Warnings: Okay. Laundry list here. Cousin incest, MPREG, one underage hobbit (we can't help it 33 is of age!) and weird food combinations.
Disclaimer: Everyone involved belongs to themselves and their creators. This is a work of fiction intended for fun and not profit. I've made no money off this venture and live only off the love of good fic.
Notes: This is for quai_dian, my new personal hero in hopes that it makes decent MPREG easier to find. Also, it's an AU stemming from book cannon set during the years between Frodo's inheriting the ring and the quest. However, you don't need to have actually read the book to understand the story. This is supposed to be funny, really. I just have a strange sense of humor.
The whole fourth month had gone relatively well, considering none of the trio had actually dealt with pregnancy first hand before. Things were going quite nicely and Merry had never been happier. He'd even taken to knitting and had not only created little bonnets of every color imaginable, but also some nice blankets.
Of course, those things can change quickly when you're pregnant and Merry was no excuse. When Pippin came flying out of their bedroom being followed by a rather large book and curses unbecoming of a hobbit he seemed to be the only one surprised.
"What did you say to him?" Frodo collected Pippin from where he'd collapsed when Merry slammed the door shut.
"He had this funny purple mark on his side and I asked him what it was." Pip sighed, letting Frodo walk him over to the fireplace where Sam had already taken the liberty of setting out a cup of tea. "I didn't know he'd go loony on me!"
"His first stretch mark." Sam winced. "That's almost as bad as telling him he's getting fat."
Pip nodded, "I'll remember that the next time I want a book thrown at my head."
"It's okay Pip, he's just adjusting." Frodo patted his shoulder sympathetically. "It won't last long."
Sam let out a small snort of a laugh. "You obviously haven’t been around that many pregnant women, Mister Frodo. He's gonna be like that until the baby's out."
Pippin sighed and sat down beside Sam on the end of the couch. "He's lost his mind, any time I try and tell him how nice he looks, or that he smells good or when I laugh at his jokes he takes it all wrong. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells just bein' round him."
"His whole body's changin'." Sam shook his head, "All kinds of things going on that he don't understand…do you blame him for bein' crazy?"
Pip only shrugged. "I think he's beautiful, he's taken to motherhood well…and I tried to tell him how handsome he was and all he could say was 'I'm ugly, I'll never be pretty again.' just over and over. Am I not supposed to compliment him?"
"You're doing your best." Frodo pulled a chair up to sit across from the both. "These things just happen."
"What can I do to make it so he won't kill me in my sleep?" Pip wasn't sure if he was joking or not.
"Lock up all the breakables, heavy objects and anything sharp or pointy." Sam didn't sound like he was joking.
Before anyone could respond, Merry's voice called out down the hallway; "Pippin, dear, could you bring me some gooseberry jam and an apple?"
"Duty calls." Pip sighed, noticing the pity looks both Sam and Frodo gave him as he made his way to the kitchen.
He knew it was his fault, the whole thing could have been avoided if he'd never told Merry he loved him six years ago at the pond behind the old mill in Buckland. In a way, he regretted bringing them together, being the one to instigate everything. Merry was always so careful, calculated and hesitant about everything…as if he were thinking each moment through before he lived it. And yet, they'd still ended up in a sticky situation, to say the least. He knew he had to be the problem because Meriadoc Brandybuck would never make a mistake on his own accord, anytime one of their schemes went wrong it was because he was too slow or something was too heavy for him to carry…because he didn't think when he was with Merry. It was all about action, seizing the opportunity because it was presented.
And where had it put him? He'd gotten involved with a hobbit that he was related to, far younger than and happened to be male. It had gotten Merry to fall in love with him. It had gotten them both in load of trouble over the years. And now it had gotten Merry pregnant. Why couldn't he have been rational all those years back and let Merry go off and fall in love with some girl and have a family like he was supposed to.
The answer was simple, love. He loved Merry too much to let him go. To let the fact that he was far too old to be laying with the Thain's child or that it wasn't natural for them to be in love slip right past Merry's never ending thought process. Had it never occurred to Merry that one day Pippin Took would be his undoing?
And now it was settled, they'd made their choices and even under the circumstances they had to hold on by their love alone. He would stay by Merry, until the end of time if possible. He could only hope Merry felt the same.
A little shaken by the sudden influx of rather depressing thoughts, Pippin gathered the requested food from the kitchen and went to his love's side to make amends for the mistakes he never seemed to stop making.
<><><>
They'd rested together in harmony, and Pippin twined Merry's tender curls in his fingers until his lover had nearly fallen asleep with the book he was reading.
"I'm sorry I've gone mad." Merry looked over at Pip with misty eyes that usually signaled either sleep or a good cry was near. "I didn't mean to throw my book at you earlier."
"I know, it was unfair of me to mention the mark, I just didn't know what it was and thought maybe you'd hurt yourself."
"Am I that clumsy?"
"No, of course not." Pip shook his head, trying to make Merry believe he wasn't ready to coat the entire hole in really thick mats so he couldn't hurt himself with as much as he'd been falling down. "You just haven't found your balance yet."
"It's a lot different, having this…belly." Merry clasped his hands over the bulge that had become fairly apparent to anyone that cared to notice. It was still small enough to be put off as a potbelly, but was undoubtedly enough to throw off Merry's mobility. "I didn't think I would show this soon, I mean given that some girls don't ever get fat."
"You aren't fat, you're wonderful." Pippin smiled and let his hand slide under his partner's shirt (the waistcoat having been long discarded). "I could always use a little more of you in my life."
Merry's eyes shifted a little and Pippin realized he was trying to make more out of the comment than intended. He waited for the tears or well placed sucker punch, but none came. Only that dreaded silence.
"Love you." Pip pouted when Merry turned away with a sigh.
At first Merry didn't respond and Pip removed his hand and moved to get up and leave him be. It had become more obvious than ever that if Merry wanted to be left alone it was best to let him be alone. But then Merry grabbed him by the sleeve and pulled him back. "Don't go, I know you were just kidding around."
Pip smiled as Merry looked back at him. "I…I…" He tried to find the words to say and Merry looked at him expectantly. "I…I feel like I mess everything up." At last, the words had been said and it didn't look like Merry was any worse off having heard it. Of course, it was hard to tell anymore.
It seemed like days had gone by, the two of them just staring at each other until Merry responded; "You don't mess everything up."
Pip laughed, his own words now feeling like a bit of a joke to him. "Sorry Merry, didn't mean to say something like that. My brain just hasn't been working right lately."
"I know the feeling." Merry smiled when Pip laughed. "I feel like I'm this whole other person, like I've lost it and there's none of me left."
"You're still my Merry." Pip ruffled the older hobbit's hair, then let their hands lock together. "Even though you're crazy."
Merry's smile suddenly turned quite devilish and he ran his free hand down the side of Pippin's face. "You know what we haven't done since that night?"
Pippin swallowed roughly. They hadn't done much more than kissing and tickling since the week the now infamous incident took place. Part of his brain back-pedaled, was it safe for Merry to be foolin' around in his state? Was it safe for the baby? "Do you think we should?"
Merry nodded, his grin broadening. "I think you should go and fetch the bath oil Frodo uses and give each other a fully body massage."
Pip felt the pink rising in his ears as he watched Merry's lips. Oil. Full body massage. He nodded dumbly and managed to get off the bed and down the long hallway without falling on his face. As he rummaged through Frodo's shelves of soaps and oils looking for something that smelled the least like flowers his mind ran over the situation once more.
Here he was, Sam and Frodo could be just about anywhere in the house and Merry's libido picked just that moment to jump in. And while he was never the shy one, he still felt the need to think it over. Merry was four months pregnant and wanted to have some sort of sex. All right. That was reasonable, after all one still has needs even if they are in a certain state. Merry wanted to have sex. Merry. Sex. Right.
His brain was beginning to falter a bit when he found the lavender oil he'd been looking for and turned leave, walking right into Samwise Gamgee.
Samwise was a reasonable hobbit, and had taken all the news in stride over the course of the month he'd been privy to Merry's condition. It had been much easier to explain it to him than they'd imagined, and he accepted Merry's pregnancy without question. He'd also proved to be a great help as he knew more about pregnant women than Pip and Frodo combined. So, it was definitely shocking when Sam said; "You'll want to use the unscented oil if you're planning more than a foot rub, Peregrin."
Pip raised an eyebrow, "What are you suggesting, Gamgee?" He knew exactly what Sam was suggesting, but was curious as to why he felt the need to suggest it at all. After all, oil was just oil…it didn't mean they were planning anything.
"Nothing, Took." Sam smirked, "Just a helpful hint. Lavender may help release the tension in a sore back, but isn't useful for much else. This…" he picked up a rather large unmarked bottle; "This is better suited for everyday use."
Pippin was blushing to the roots of his hair for sure. Timid ole Samwise was standing there telling him about lubrication like a professional. Of course, he had to ask; "So now you're the expert on making things slippery?"
"Nobody's complained about my massages yet."
"And by nobody, you mean Frodo, don't you?" Pip tried the sly attack on the painfully obvious relationship Frodo and Sam had both tried to hide from them.
"My massaging Mister Frodo is none of your business." Sam held true to his confidence even though he too was showing a hint of embarrassment. "Just be gentle with Mister Merry now, he's in no condition to get too excited."
Still shocked from his revealing conversation with Samwise, Pippin nearly dropped the bottle of unscented rubbing oil when he opened the door to find Merry laying on the bed wearing nothing but a grin.
They played at first, taking turns massaging out the stiffness of life, then worked their way up to kissing and caressing. Gentle, then not so gentle. Before Pip could refuse (not that he would, really), Merry had him pinned to the bed face down in the blankets. Sam was right about the oil, very right. He had no need to worry about being gentle with Merry, 'cause Merry seemed to be having a good enough time being the rough one. A good enough time that Pippin felt in his bones for three glorious days.
<><><>
Of course, Merry's libido wasn't much of a problem once Pippin got used to the fact that the fellow he woke up next to smelling of sex happened to have a baby inside him. And then one morning, well into the fifth month, he panicked when he woke up and instead of his arm being draped over his lover's chest he was very gently cupping a small breast.
He was young, and Merry was his first love…and he'd never woken up cupping something so firm yet fleshy on his lover's chest. The feeling was almost like holding a hot water bottle that had been sitting out a while. When he regained his senses, he sat up as quickly as he could without waking Merry and just stared. He couldn't help it. He was sure when they'd gone to bed the night before Merry had looked a little more developed in the chest and belly, but now he had actually grown breasts. Could one just grow them over night like that?
Silently, he slipped out of bed and pulled on his trousers before wandering out to the sitting room to find Frodo.
"Morning Pip." Frodo smiled as he drank his tea. "How is Merry this morning?"
"Still sleeping, but…different."
"Different?"
"Would you believe me if I told you he grew breasts overnight?" Pippin whispered, lowering his eyes.
Frodo looked very confused, then went to the window and called out, "Sam! Sam! Come here a moment, please!"
A very sweaty and somewhat dirty Samwise made an appearance in the doorway some moments later, "Yes Mister Frodo?"
"What do you know about breasts?" Pippin raised an eyebrow, a little shocked when Sam faltered.
"Breasts, sir?" he looked more than a little confused.
"Merry seems to have developed them since yesterday." Frodo sighed.
"Oh." Sam nodded. "I suppose he'll be needin' 'em when the baby comes, won't he?"
Pippin furrowed his brow, again he hadn't even thought about breast feeding…they didn't even know how they were going to get the baby out to begin with.
"He's probably been growin' 'em for a couple months now, but they were too small to notice. Now they're startin' to get ready for the birth." Sam shuffled his feet, looking nervous. "When most girls have their first child they say they get so big it hurts."
"Their breasts actually hurt?" Pippin raised an eyebrow.
"Aye, sir. They gotta make the milk to feed the babies." Sam nodded.
Pippin wondered, not for the first time, how Sam had garnered such a knowledge…but was glad he had. "You're amazing, Samwise."
"I've had a lot of pregnant women in my life." Sam shrugged, "My mum, my sisters, my cousins…" He left the room, quietly listing the various relations he'd dealt with through pregnancy and Frodo and Pip were left to think over the new information.
"Do you think he'll actually feed the baby out of 'em?" Pip leaned back on the couch, running his hands over his own bare chest as he tried to imagine himself in that position. "If we ever figure out how to get the baby out of him."
Frodo shrugged. "I think part of that problem may be solved, though. I sent Gandalf a letter two weeks ago requesting some kind of assistance, but I haven't heard back."
"He'll know what to do." Pip nodded, of course, Gandalf was a wizard and wizards knew everything there was to know.
"How do you think Merry will react when he finds out he's…grown…over night?" Frodo sighed.
Images of flying objects came to Pippin's mind, but he merely responded; "If Sam's right then he probably already knows about it."
They didn't have long to think about it before Merry came to say good morning and join them for breakfast still in his nightshirt with his hair in bed-snarls.
The table was so quiet each bite seemed horribly loud. Merry had said nothing about how he was feeling and none of them had the courage to ask. Frodo looked at Pip demandingly, and Pip stared at Sam who looked to Frodo, none of them quite willing to break Merry's silence.
"So, Merry…" Pippin finally cracked, his voice hushed as he looked over at his partner, "How are you feeling this morning?"
Merry dropped his knife as he finished slathering his muffin with cream. They all watched as the knife clattered to the floor and Merry only gave an exasperated sigh and replied; "Same as every morning."
"Would you like a back rub?" Pippin picked up the dropped utensil and set it aside.
"No."
Frodo tried next, "Another muffin, Merry?"
"No."
It seemed Sam was their last chance of cheering Merry up even a little bit, and they were all ready to beat him senseless when he said; "You look terrible."
Merry's face slipped from total indifference to a flash of anger and Sam added, "You want to talk about it?"
Both Frodo and Pippin watched in total awe as Merry's anger melted and he actually smiled gently at the corners of his lips. "I just feel kind of vulnerable." Merry responded softly. "Like I'm a danger to myself."
Sam nodded, his face a portrait of understanding. "You feel like you've lost control of yourself."
Merry nodded, finishing his muffin. "Exactly. How did you know?"
Pippin gave in to the fact that as far as Merry was concerned neither he nor Frodo were in the same room.
"Mum always said if I weren’t such a good gardener I should be a midwife. They're actually pretty similar. Having a baby inside you is like a seed in the earth. And that seed changes that bit of earth forever, and if you nurture them both and feed their needs a beautiful flower is born." He blushed a little, obviously not used to talking about things like that.
Pippin blinked a few times, watching as Merry and Sam made the strangest of connections. He didn't really understand what they were talking about, but if it meant Merry was out of his hormone induced trance it was worth being a little befuddled.
"It's all about nurturin'." Sam smiled, standing up and clearing away his dishes before heading back out to the garden.
Frodo raised an eyebrow at Pip as Merry only smiled and shook his head.
"I had a rough night." Merry finally opened up a little. "I kept having this nightmare that I was all alone and the baby was coming."
"I won't let you be all alone." Pip put his hand over Merry's. "We're in this together."
Merry only nodded and reached for another muffin.
<><><>
Still, life around Bag End went on. Every morning Sam and Merry had their little conversations and Frodo and Pip watched in mild amazement. Every afternoon Merry got to have his temper tantrum and every evening they would do something together (Usually they'd read, tell each other stories or have sex) until Merry fell complacently asleep.
The more time passed, the more Pippin realized that being a dad wasn't going to be as scary as he thought. Sure, babies were delicate and there was always something that could hurt them…but that's what dads were for. He became increasingly attuned to his partner's needs, rubbing Merry's sore muscles or offering him a shoulder to cry on when he was at his most hopeless. And through it all he realized just what it was all leading to. There he was, still a tweenager, ready to be a parent. If he could stomach Merry's new obsession with sardines and porridge he could take anything.
It seemed like each day Merry got a little bigger, but a little happier with the way things were going. Every so often he'd break down and wonder aloud about if he'll be able to be a real mother, if this were all really happening to him and asking why he'd been picked to bear a child of all hobbits.
It wasn't always pretty, but life wasn't too bad. Almost six months had passed without too many waves and dealing with Merry was becoming less of a mystery and more of a joy.
"Will you still love me if I keep getting fatter?" Merry was laying in bed with a towel draped over his lap as they lazed around their room after their bath.
Pip looked up from where he'd been getting ready to sew on a button that had popped off his shirt and responded; "Of course, Merry."
"Even if I'm too fat to roll out of bed?" Merry rubbed his belly, "Even if I'm so fat I need a special door?"
"Even if you're so fat you could bust right open any second." Pip smirked.
"I finished my blanket." Merry started a new topic as Pip fumbled with the needle. "I'm thinking about making a red one next."
"You finished the blue one?" Pip looked up again.
"And the yellow one." Merry smiled, going through the ever growing bag of yarn beside the bed. "Sam says I'm getting quite good at it."
"He does?" Pip nodded, going back to attempting to thread the needle. Merry and Samwise had become quite the pair it seemed. He'd taught Merry how to knit the first week they were there and since then they'd been having their talks practically every morning. "That's good."
"Are you even listening?" Pip could hear the pout in Merry's voice letting him know Merry felt like he wasn't getting enough attention.
"Always." Pippin gave up hope of mending his own shirt and handed it to Merry. "The thread is being difficult."
"I'll sew it back on." Merry laughed to himself and went to quick work on the pesky button as Pippin watched in amusement. "Quite the housewife I've become, 'eh Pip?"
As usual with Merry's questions Pip didn't know how to respond. If he agreed, then he was calling Merry a lass…and if he didn't he'd be insulting the skills he'd learned being cooped up all day for almost four months. Instead, he changed the subject…quickly. "Frodo and I were going to go to the market today."
"Oh." Merry nodded, almost done with Pip's shirt. "That's nice."
"But I won't go if you'd rather have me here." Pip jumped quickly. "Frodo can go by himself."
"It's all right. I'm a grown hobbit and I can take care of myself." Merry tied off the knot a little violently and Pip rushed to cover himself from Merry's wrath.
"Of course, I just thought that maybe you'd want to stay in a play cards or something this afternoon." He smiled.
"I can just as easily play cards with Sam."
Pippin shrugged. "All right, would you like anything special?"
"If you could find a few patterns I want to start learning how to sew baby clothes." Merry sounded quite serious.
"All right." Pip tried not to sound surprised.
"Sam's going to teach me."
Pippin gritted his teeth, holding himself back from going 'Well, Samwise is perfect, isn't he?' and not meaning it. "That's nice of him."
"He learned all that stuff so he didn't have to worry about taking a wife. Isn't that sweet?" Merry smiled, completely unaware of Pip's rising jealousy. "He can cook, clean, sew, fix just about anything…and he's teaching me how to do that stuff too."
"Wonderful." Pippin took his shirt and put it on reaching for his waistcoat, just about ready to boil over. "Maybe you two could teach me some day."
Merry shook his head, smiling. "Why would you need to know how to do all that stuff when I can do it?"
"Silly me." Pip ran his fingers though his hair and gave Merry a kiss on the forehead.
"Are you upset about something?" Merry raised an eyebrow as Pip strapped on his pouch and got ready to leave.
"Not a thing, love." Pip lied a little and gave his lover a deep kiss. "Now play nice with the other boys while I'm away."
Merry giggled again, "Don't worry about me, Pip. I'm sure I'll be fine."
"It's not you I'm worried about, it's poor Samwise. You're the best card player in Buckland." Pip smirked, shouldering his small pack for his purchases.
<><><>
Pippin had never been to the Hobbiton market before, but it wasn't nearly as big as he'd expected. Various farmers and craftsmen hawked their wares and soon both he and Frodo were caught up in the swirl of commerce.
They reached the end of grower's row and were getting just about ready to round the corner when they heard a familiar voice laughing at the last stall.
"Sam?" Pippin turned around and saw Samwise with his younger sister who was selling small wreathes of flowers.
"Afternoon Pip, Mister Frodo. Nice day for market." Sam smiled brightly.
"I thought you were spending the day out at Bag End." Pippin looked at both Frodo and Sam confused.
"I told you yesterday Sam would be out at market today." Frodo shook his head, "Don't you remember?"
"No, I thought he was playing cards with Merry while we were gone. Merry's all alone up there!" Pippin shook his head in disbelief. He was an idiot, a complete and total idiot. How do you forget to have someone keeping an eye on your pregnant lover?
"He's fine, Pip." Frodo patted him roughly on the back. "Merry can take care of himself."
"He needs somebody to be there." Pip sighed, "I need someone to be there and make sure he doesn't hurt himself!"
"His balance has been a little off, but if he's still layin' in bed knitting he should be all right." Sam shrugged.
"I'm assuming he's already started to wonder where you are." Pip pointed at Sam, "Probably went outside looking for you! What if someone sees him? What if he falls down? I won't be able to live with myself if one hair is so much as out of place when I get back." Pippin tucked the last of his purchases away and turned towards Bag End. "I have to go back."
"We haven't got everything yet." Frodo interrupted, "We're almost done, there's only one more row."
"You can go yourself, Frodo. I have to check on Merry." Pip was nearly frantic.
"I admire your dedication, Pip, but he doesn't need somebody takin' care of him every second." Sam tapped Pip's shoulder roughly, "He can look after himself for an afternoon."
Pippin didn't care about their protests, he took off running towards Bagshot Row as fast as his feet would carry him. He didn't see Merry anywhere outside, so proceeded directly to the front door and threw it open to see Merry sprawled out on his back on the floor directly in front of the large sitting room.
He pulled Merry up as fast as he could, hugging him and kissing his face. "How did you end up on the floor?"
"I was waiting for Sam to come in and tried laying on the sofa, but it was too soft so I tried laying on the floor and couldn't get back up." Merry sighed. "I was actually quite comfortable."
"Don't scare me like that, when I saw Sam down at market I rushed home to make sure you were all right." He held on tight as Merry tried to pull away.
"Pip, love, it's all right. I'm fine! I don't need a babysitter." Merry sighed and Pip held him tight. "But if you squish me any more I may not be so round when you let go."
"I was just so worried that somethin' happened to you and nobody was there to make sure you were all right." Pip let Merry pull away a bit and continued to kiss him and stroke his hair. "I'd die if I lost you."
End Part 2
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